Free Meditation

http://freemeditation.us/

Better to learn to meditate and quite the mind than say anything negative to yourself ever again! Having good thoughts in your head about yourself and others is free and so is this site.

Watch the new version of Searching for Angela Shelton for FREE!

You can now watch the new version of Searching for Angela Shelton and embed it in your own website or blog!

http://www.snagfilms.com/films/title/searching_for_angela_shelton/

The Courage to Heal

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http://www.ellenbass.com/

http://angelashelton.com/

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Healing Holly

Thank you for reading and contributing to the Survivor Manual. My work started and continues because of the people like you who support it. I meet heroes daily from all walks of life. What started out as a simple project of interviewing women who shared my name turned into a bond with thousands of people of all ages, races, and religions.

As I write another movie and work on my comedy show, I continue to speak around the country, consult other writers and filmmakers on their projects, and provide inspiration and avenues towards healing and awareness. I have just met another hero among you and I want to tell you about her and request your help, hope, and heart.

I started my comedy cooking show, Stirring Up Trouble, to have some balance in my life after years of working in the trauma world. I have been contacted by many of you asking for recipes and wanting to be a part of the show, one of whom is a girl named Holly. Holly emailed me, offering help on the new website. After checking out her online community for women, healing and feminist blogs, I could tell that she knew what she was doing, so I accepted her offer. She added those cute little buttons so that you can now forward the show to your friends on myspace, facebook, stumble it, digg it, or post it on delicious. Check out what she did at StirringUpTrouble.com.

Holly sent me an email telling me that the site was live and apologized for being out of communication for a bit. She said that she'd been sleeping an unusual amount and felt groggy. I, knowing some of her story of child sexual abuse, asked her if she was using sleep as a coping mechanism. Many times when things come up that we have a hard time facing, we will go to sleep, literally. I suggested that she write about that on her healing blog and I would put it on the Survivor Manual.

But the reasons for Holly's unusual sleep patterns go much deeper than coping. It turns out that Holly has Periodontal Disease, which is a gum disease that swells your gums up to the point where they become inflamed and hurt very badly. Periodontal Disease releases toxins through your gums that you swallow all the time. The reason Holly has begun sleeping so much is because these toxins are beginning to get worse and are making her nauseous. I looked up Periodontal Disease and found that if it is left untreated it can lead to a seizure or a heart attack. Recently Holly told me that she has been feeling electric-like surges throughout her face.

The reason I'm writing this is because this all began with child abuse. When Holly was a young child, not only was her mother selling her to men for sexual favors to be able to afford her drug addiction, but Holly's mother was also violent. She pushed Holly into the street one day when Holly was about 3. Holly fell, hit her face on a street curb, and all of her front teeth pushed into her gums. She had to get them surgically removed.

Holly's front teeth didn't grow back in until she was around 8 and when they did, they grew in extremely crooked and her mouth produced more teeth than would fit. To top it off, Holly's wisdom teeth are coming in. One of them is all the way grown in and another that is growing in now. Why am I telling you all of this? Because Holly is uninsured and cannot afford to get any of this fixed. She's been trying to take odds and ends jobs but the pain is keeping her from working as much as she could. Holly's father was paying child support plus the court costs and lawyer costs to try to get Holly and her younger sister away from their mother, so there was no money to get Holly's teeth fixed when she was young and they have continued to worsen. Holly has tried getting on welfare, free clinics, and sliding scale clinics, and every time they either don't have enough oral surgeons for all the help she needs or she makes too much or too little money.

I know what it's like to not have insurance and not be able to pay for health care. A few years ago I had such an intense asthma attack that I had to be rushed to the hospital. Because I was unable to breathe, I was rushed right into the emergency room. It was after I was put onto a breathing machine and stabilized that I was brought all the paperwork to sign. I began to cry when the nurse asked which insurance I had. Not only was I not insured but there was no way I was able to pay for a hospital bill. The nurse had seen my documentary and knew what I did and who I was. She was an angel in my life and erased any trace of me having been in the hospital and I never received a bill. She also provided me with some free inhalers before I left. I don't know what I would have done at the time if that nurse had not miraculously shown up.

I wouldn't tell you about Holly if she wasn't a warrior and a hero. She has done so much for Women's rights, helping other survivors heal, and setting up websites for amazing women - like myself! Just like people have helped me along the way, I am going to help Holly and I am asking for your help. I'm asking that all of us pitch in and get Holly's teeth fixed. If I could simply write a check and make her bills disappear I would. But I have not gotten rich by dedicating my life to helping others. I am rich in Spirit from knowing so many of you but the bank account has not caught up yet. So I set up a paypal email under givelove@angelashelton.com so we can all chip in. I realize that we're in a financial crisis and because of that we are all going to need to bond together as a community more and more in the future.

The gist of Holly's story is in an interview she did for her local newspaper in 2007 here : http://www.thetimes-tribune.com/articles/2007/01/08/top_local_stories/17682154.txt

If Holly doesn't get the Periodontal Disease taken care of, she could die from a seizure or a heart attack because of all of the toxins her mouth produces. If I had not had that angel for a nurse I would not have been able to breathe - literally. I care about this girl and I want to help her. Healing Holly is not going to solve all of the problems in the world but it will be one amazing story with a happy ending that I personally really want to see.

Please be one of Holly's angels! The many procedures she needs are going to be very expensive so any amount helps. If everyone who gets this gave a little something - we may save a life! I have been speaking to one of the top dentists in Beverly Hills but if there are any dental surgeons around the world, Holly will fly wherever she needs to in order to fix this painful problem. The donations are gifts and not tax write-offs. If you or someone you know is part of a non-profit willing to collect and donate the money as well, please help.

You can contact me directly at angela@angelashelton.com and put Healing Holly in the subject. Go to paypal.com and send money to givelove@angelashelton.com or use this button:

Angela Shelton in Texas

Yay for Kathy and Jenn in Texas! That was a great event!

A

Claiming Your Crown

I just went through the excruciating and exhilarating experience of becoming a Queen. For those who have followed my journey of recovery and healing, you have seen and heard me about the process of moving from self-hatred to self-love. I talk about the healing process at length in Finding Angela Shelton (that is required reading in more schools now!). But much like the peeling of an onion, there are always layers to move through when you continue to get better, stronger, and more resilient. I have been entrenched in the trauma world for over 7 years now and have heard thousands of stories of abuse and violence and watched many transformations from victim to warrior occur. By warrior I do not mean fighting for vengeance but rather being the whole human who stands for love, courage, and strength. I now know many warriors and am blessed to see more people shifting their lives into wholeness instead of falling back into victim-hood with repeated patterns.

I just went through another birthing process myself where I coveted and claimed my crown as Queen! Coming from someone who was a self-hater, that is one amazing transition! I have talked a lot about the process of changing the pathways in your brain from the negative thoughts to positive thoughts like replacing "I am worthless and stupid" with "I am a Goddess Warrior." It may sound far too simple and childish to simply catch and switch your thoughts but it works. I went from a self-mutilator to a Goddess and it was all due to changing my thought patterns.

At one of my springtime speaking engagements a woman told me that she thought that I was Queen and not just a Goddess. On stage I am always encouraging audiences to find new and powerful words to use to replace negative thought patterns. I had not thought about the term Queen for myself before though. So over the summer I processed that word and began to use it and guess what - I am a Queen. I claimed my crown. I moved past my fear of moving to new levels of courage and strength and I biked for 25 miles a day, learned to spin fire, became a climber, took up guitar, and produced an online cooking show to boot! At 35 years old I am in better shape than I have ever been in my life, I look and feel great, and those old negative self-hatred thoughts are so far away that they do not fit anywhere in my life now. The negative thoughts are unrecognizable just like the positive ones used to be when I was stuck in the old patterns.

For those of you who still have the bits of self-hatred lingering, I promise you that when you work on your thought patterns that it really does change your life. I never thought I would transform into the person I am today when I began this journey of Searching for and Finding Angela Shelton - but I am a living example that it works.

This fall I will be going into much more detail about Removing the Sword of Trauma and using it with Love. I'm excited to see many of you again and to watch more Kings and Queens emerge like Joe in the picture!


Contact events@angelashelton.com to book me in your area.

Sword of Trauma

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These images are part of my new event - Removing the Sword of Trauma. You can contact my mom at events@angelashelton.com or joann@angelashelton.com to bring me to your community.

I love this program!

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Stop Abusing Yourself and Dance!

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Tonight in Seattle!

March 19th: Annual Rosie the Riveter Slam & Featured Performer Dorothy Lemoult

Open Mic, Featured Performer and the Annual Rosie the Riveter Slam:The 3rd Annual Rosie Slam is open to Women Only in honor of National Women’s History Month.
Email info@seattlepoetryslam.org for more info.
When screenwriter Angela Shelton set out to make a documentary country interviewing other women who shared her name, she was shocked to find that 70% had been victims of rape, childhood sexual assault and/or domestic violence. This surprising journey also led Angela to confront her own abusive past. The multi-award winning documentary that culminated has started a grassroots movement of survivors and humanitarian organizations around the world who are breaking the silence about the epidemic of abuse. Angela has appeared on the Oprah Winfrey show, 48 Hours Investigates and an exclusive version of “Searching for Angela Shelton” aired on Lifetime TV in April 2006.
As part of a call to action for a healing revolution, actor and director and playwright Dorothy Lemoult will lead an all female cast in bringing several of Angela Shelton’s monologues to life as our feature for the evening.

WEDNESDAY MARCH 19TH AT TOST in Seattle!

Come out and support one of the Angels!

The 30 Day Finding Angela Shelton Journey!

Check out this amazing letter I received! It is from the 30 Day Finding Angela Shelton Journey. WOW!

Hi Angela Shelton.

What a ride! Today was my Day 30 on your Angela Shelton Journey. I can only begin to tell you how emotional the last 37 days have been for me. So many tears and emotions that some days I just couldn't click on the day's Journey email, and had to wait a day or two.

Thank you thank you thank you. Your program is truly inspired and a blessing from all that is good and loving and healing in the universe. Your messages are right-on, and your videos so intense, funny, and personal. I have learned SO much and still have work to do, but a shift in my healing has definitely taken place.

I thought I would share with you my Day 22 drawing of what joy would look like to me. This was done with markers on a file folder. I certainly wouldn't have felt this without your program, and the assignment gave me this light-hearted image of joy. I have kept it up where I see it many times each day, and it makes me smile every time, and lifts those old vibes up.

I will also share my Day 26 Mission Statement:

I am a beautiful entity, a divine spark of God who is on this planet to learn to love and to play and love and have fun. I pray to be a fountain of love to the world and to be a bright loving light to myself and therefore to others. I am joyous Jaye who exited the blame game.

Thank you for your work, from deep in my heart to you, and so much more than I can say right now.

Jaye

Dear Jane....

Jane!

You tried to communicate and it was erased so quickly. Can you try again? Send it to orders@ or filmmaker@ Can you become friends here too: http://www.myspace.com/angelasarmyofangels

I'm glad you're still alive. I spoke with another one of you on myspace awhile back. That was creepy. It is so hard to tell when they are watching and when they are not - so here we are right out in the open! Keep going girl. Save and hide your money. You should report it on or before the 29th of April too, even if you just do it online http://reportitnow.org/reportabuse.html The more you tell it, the less power they have over you.

Angela

Feeling like you Failed?

To know me is to laugh.

This fail blog is for all of you who have said you feel like you failed. During the process of healing there is that dark point where the sword is still in you and you're pulling it out but you feel like you'll never get past the pain. You know what I'm talking about. Well, here is a blog that was just sent to me to perhaps lift your spirits and show you that again, you are not alone. Here is a fail blog.

Keep moving forward. As Angela Shelton Detroit said to me, "Sometimes life hits you upside the head but you have to keep going and keep trusting."

Ways to Communicate

Oh boy! Here is a new way to communicate - the http://www.bureauofcommunication.com/
Very fun and helpful! Communicate!

Survivor Manual TV!

I added a tab to the TV page for "Survivor Manual".

There is a video up there of me doing a healing technique with Todd Brazee that is pretty awesome. It may make you cry though, so be warned. It is 25 min long.

Watch it on the Angela Shelton TV tab under "Survivor Manual".

Report Sexual abuse! Report IT!

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http://reportitnow.org/

Please fill out our ONLINE FORM. You can expose the sexual violence that happened to yourself or a friend or loved one if they are deceased or cannot speak for themselves. You can fill out the form anytime on or before April 29th. Thank you!

This IS NOT an official police report! We are using this form to show the vast numbers and want you to show up in person on Feb 19th and April 29th to your county courthouses!

Go to your country courthouse on Feb. 19th, 2008 for the Victims Rights Rally to launch the Report IT Campaign.

On April 1st, 2008 go to your local Barnes and Noble and meet other survivors when you buy Angela Shelton's book Finding Angela Shelton. Read the book, be inspired, and Report sexual violence that has happened to you or a loved one on our online form and get your friends to do that same. Start conversations! It is very likely that you know someone who has experienced sexual violence.

Go to your country courthouse on Angela Shelton Day, April 29th with everyone else to show that you are not alone!

Contact PAVE to get involved!! http://pavingtheway.net/

Dear Jane,

I got your message and yes, it is okay to be angry. You live in hell, of course you can be angry. There are many in your situation being held in prison by their family - literally. I spoke to another one of them online. But it was her dad poising as her - soooo creepy. He revealed himself pretty early on that it was really him. He's so dumb that he didn't even realize that I figured out I was talking to him and not his daughter. Creep. When you think about it, it makes sense that he was on there pretending to by his young girl and talking to her friends. Gross. Yet another way to control the one you are abusing and get your rocks off talking to their friends! Perps have all kinds of ways to stop an escape. They watch your every move.

You have to be smarter than them.

When your own family abuses you many times (like yourself) you made an agreement that in order to survive you were going to split. The problem is that you can forget that you made that agreement and have a really hard time putting all the pieces of yourself back together. You are not crazy. You abusers are crazy and they try to make you think you are crazy.

As far as getting out goes, you have to save money. It is very good that you got a job. I suggest you have them pay you through paypal and start a new account that no one knows about - don't use the account you already have that they know about! Hide and save your money even if you have to open a safety deposit box somewhere.

Express your anger away from them. Practice sports. Learn to fight. If you express yourself around them they will only put down the fortress walls quicker and heavier. You've got to think ninja-style and be smarter than them in order to escape. You and I both know that if you stay he will get your pregnant and then rape your children. That is the cold hard fact.



Jane History:
http://survivormanual.blogspot.com/2007/11/dear-jane.html
http://survivormanual.blogspot.com/2007/12/is-it-okay-to-express-myself-and-get.html
If you were following my old blog on angelashelton.com/weblog - this is the girl who we tried to save. http://www.angelashelton.com/weblog/2007/03/16/the-past-two-weeks/
I call her Jane now instead of Katie. So when you see Dear Jane, I am talking to her as well as a few just like her. There are many in this situation - just take the roof off of family courts nationwide and you will find a boatload of horror!

Love Fraud - Beware of Sociopaths

Check this site out! LoveFraud.com
I just met the people who run it and it is a resource site about how to beware of the sociopath with no heart, no conscience, no remorse. Be on the lookout, especially as you begin to get better, heal, and leave abusive situations - learn how to spot a con so you don't repeat patterns!

Love Fraud dot com!

PHOTOGRAPHY BOOK NEEDS PARTICIPANTS

Lorena Ros, an international award-winning photographer from Barcelona, is working on a book about survivors of childhood sexual abuse.

I know Lorena and she is awesome! Her photographs are beautiful. She is looking for adult survivors of childhood sexual abuse to participate – the book will be a combination of photographs and survivors’ stories. Interested parties can visit her website to learn more: www.lorenaros.com

I have sent her a few of my survivor friends already - and if any of you are near Charleston, she is looking to be there in Feb to photograph more of you!

Fighting for Jessica

Make an on-line slideshow at www.OneTrueMedia.com

I thought many of you may like to see this. This is a story I know well and an example of how you can move on, fight, and take back your Light. Check out her bat!

Fight for Jessica.

Combating the Inner Critic

Realistically, we aren't going to heal and go through the rest of our lives without a bad day. Money is going to get tight, the kids are going to act up, people are going to be rude, and your computer is going to crash. What do you do when life hits you hard and it seems like there is no relief in site?

We all have voices inside of us. One of them is, what my therapist calls, the inner critic. That is the one that tells you that you are worthless and that you can not do anything right. We also have a voice (or light)  inside of us that knows that the world is not out to get us. The part of you that understands that you are not to blame for what others do or things that have been done to you.

Healing isn't about changing reality. It is about finding the voice inside of you that reinforces healthy thought patterns. For some of us that voice may be small and hard to find. For others that voice is easy to locate. The more that you strive to hear the good things your mind has to say the closer you will be to hearing that voice all the time.

When your inner critic starts to talk make a conscious effort to find your true voice. Look for the light inside of you. Breathe and listen to the positive things you already know about yourself. You don't have to believe them at first. Just look for them and repeat those positive things over and over until the inner critic gets a little quieter.  Taking the time to nurture the light inside of you helps you to realize your potential and leads you toward living a joyful life.